The Nativity

What is the reason of your existence? Were you born out of love or out of luck? How do you feel about it?

Playing colors with the brush is quite interesting for a trying hard artist like me. I’m kind of upset if there were overlapping of colors and out of line combination but despite of difficulties, I’m enjoying doing paint by numbers because it diverts my attention from depression one way or the other.

Doing this paint by numbers is kind of challenging to me and I could say that this was the most difficult painting I ever had in 2019. It took me for about 3 weeks to finish it if I remember it right because of its tiny complicated details. 

“Did you see the struggles they went through?” I heard this question out of nowhere in the quietness of the night. “What do you mean?” I asked but there was silence.

When I started putting on colors to baby Jesus, I felt embarrassed. Why? Because this baby Jesus was born to die. So what is the point of living in this world, just for him to die? I mean, it’s better not to be born, right? But, Jesus was born and what is His purpose? He was born to die for us - for us to be saved from sin, to set us free from darkness and transform us to the Kingdom of Light.

How hard is it for Jesus to live everyday knowing that He will suffer and die one day - not of natural death, not of his own sin but because of our sin. I wonder how it feels but it's like a torture for me. I mean, such responsibility is too heavy to bear but Jesus is different. He embraced His divine destiny in obedience to the will of the Father because He knew that the Father loved the world He created and everything in it. He don't want us to be perished but to have everlasting life.

I admired Mary for such a strong woman. Imagine the struggles she went through while living with Joseph and the baby in her womb - the humiliation and gossip among others, how could she bear it all? Would she live in peace if Joseph dumped her? We read in the scriptures how her heart was troubled when she received the message from Archangel Gabriel, yet, because of her obedience, she accepted the noble task and she was able to endure the hardship in life.

I’ve high respect for Joseph and I really love him. How I wish all men are like him, who would take the risk in obeying God. That though he may not understand God’s plan at that moment, still, he trust God’s heart and dismissed fear and anxiety just to fulfil what God wants him to do. Probably, he was ridiculed and humiliated too and even became the song of the drunkards but because of his devotion to God, God’s plan was carried out in his heart.

Who among us would have the heart to worship God while struggling in life? Do we have that eagerness to do it? Are we going to honor God or we’re going to ignore Him after all?    

Look at these 3 Kings or wise men, their attitude in honoring God is indeed remarkable. How pleasant it is to travel without knowing your destination? It's kind of pathetic, right? But they did. They traveled from far away and just followed the star. What is the significance of the star then? If they don't have a deeper understanding of what they saw, they will just ignored it but no, they saw the sign of the great King and recognized it. Their persistence in honoring and worshipping God was their priority despite of perilous journey.  

At that moment, I was comforted because God addressed the struggles I went through. He allowed me to see things that assured me of His faithfulness.

We may have different struggles in life, different reason of our existence but one thing is for sure, God is able to address it. We just need to open our hearts and allow Him to work in our life.

This painting was done a day before the Feast of Epiphany and was able to give it as birthday present.